Looking Back

The last 2 years have been very difficult on out family.  We have had some very high ups and some very very low lows.  Yet, as I've spent the last week looking back over them I can't help but to have seen some tremendous growth.  I'm more sure of who I am now then I have ever been in the past.  I no longer feel then need to fit someone else's vision for my life.  Truth be told my life doesn't even fit my vision for my life! It's not quite there yet but my life is on it's way to fitting God's vision for my life.  And that has made all the difference.  If you would have told me 5 years ago that I was going to be a stay at home mom who was home schooling, learning to sew and knit and was perfectly content, I would have laughed at you.  It's true though, I am happy with what I am doing.  I am working hard at finding ways to help us live frugal so that I can continue in this.

I know what kind of family I want to have.  I know how important my children are to me and that raising them is my number 1 goal in life for right now.  I know that I want to be actively involved in the raising of them, I want to raise up godly young men who know how to be responsible and take care of their families, that know how to love theirs wives and children but above all of that my goal is to raise up men who know how to, love, worship and serve God.

The past 2 years have also taught me a lot about studying God's word and seeing what it has to say for myself.  I never thought I would be one of those Pentecostal women who believed in dresses only and not cutting your hair or wearing jewelry but again here I am!  Happy and more free then I have ever been before. I have learned that being a Christian is not about rules or judging but about a personal relationship (something I had never understood before) .  It's not about how I am feeling but about worshiping anyways!  It's not about how other people see me but about how the one who created me sees me!

I am looking forward to 2011 knowing that with the Lord on my side though it may not always be easy it will always be fruitful!

A new group

I love to be in groups where I can talk to other women about the things going and get tips and ideas so here is a link to a group

Organizing Now

So I just bought this new book called "Organize Now" by Jennifer Ford Berry.  I am wanting to use it to help me become more organized this year..  The book is divided into 52 chapters (52 weeks).

 

The first week is called: Organize your Mind. And here is a summarized list of what should be focused on in the first week:

 

1) Get a minimum of 7 hours sleep per night.  Organize your schedule around your sleep.

2) Jot down a short To Do list first thing in the morning of the things you HAVE TO do and the things you WANT TO do - be realistic.

3) Start a journal.  Try to write in it every day, even if it a one sentence highlight of the day.

4) Limit the amount of television you watch.

5) Schedule a coffee/tea break two or three times a day to just relax.

6) Schedule time to exercise.

7) Schedule more "me time" - even if it is just 15 minutes.

8) Eliminate energy drainers in your life, unhealthy relationships, unfinished projects, items on your To Do list that don't need to be done.

9) Set goals and break them into doable daily To Do's

 

Once A Month:

1) Schedule a day just for you.  Do something that makes you happy.

 

Every 3-6 Months:

1) Spend an hour or two alone to take stock of your emotional state. How do you feel most of the time? How are your relationships? Count your blessings if you are happy, or evaluate why you are unhappy and make plans to change what you can.

 

Once a Year:

1) On your birthday make an effort to reflect on the past year.  What did you learn? How have you changed? What do you want to accomplish in the year to come?

I am hoping that I can keep up and do one chapter a week.  So I will  keep you posted on how it goes. 

Out Of Sorts

I am feeling out of sorts today.  I can't seem to get it together.  I know that I am not the only one that goes through this at times.  I feel like I am never listened to and that I am not really cared about.   It started with me feeling ignored and when I tried to talk about it I couldn't seem to put it into the right words so everything came out jumbled which upset him.  I know he wasn't actually trying to ignore me but I was PMSing and I know that is part of the problem.  I just feel like we are barely taking anymore and so basically I am just feeling out of sorts.  When I begin to feel this way, I start to draw back and go into my shell because it feels safer there.  In there it's harder to get hurt.  I have more control over who can get close enough to hurt me.  I know that when I do this then it causes more distance in the relationship so I am trying hard not to do this.

 

My husband is a good man, a great father and I know that he loves me.  I just wish I could figure out why this happens.  It makes me feel like I am broken unable to function normally.  I feel like either there is something wrong with me for feeling this way when it's not true or that it is true and that I am so broken that I can't be fixed.  Then I remind myself to take a step back and remember that no matter what I am a daughter of The KING loved beyond comprehension and that what I am really hearing is just tapes in my head that sometimes I hit the play button on and sometimes the devil does but that's all they are just tapes.  Just lies and falsehoods trying to assert themselves to trying me up to cause me to stumble and begin to doubt who I am in Christ and who He has made me to be.  So today I choose not only to hit the stop button on those tapes but the delete button also.  I will no longer listen to those things that have been said to me in the past.  I am not broken but with God's grace and mercy I am healed and whole.  I am not unlovable but loved beyond my understanding and because God is not here in the physical to love on me he has given me a husband, children and friends who do love me.  I am not worthless but am a prize a precious Gem, the apple of his eye.  And how do I know this because  Deuteronomy 32:10 says he kept him as the apple of His eye and Zech. 2:8 says for he that toucheth you toucheth the apple of My eye.

Lord today please, keep me as the apple of your eye and hide me under the shadow of your wings Psalm 17:8

 

Home Making

I have spent the last couple of days working on my Home Making journal.  The first thing I did was wrote down the days of the week and then placed into it our items that our schedule on the same day at the same time every week.  Then I took and added in a day of the week for me to do certain things, below is what my final draft looks like.  I made sure to include our home school schedule.

Monday

• Mom- Office Day

• Trey Live Lesson English 12-1
• Trey Live Lesson Science 9
• Tarran Live Lesson Physical Science 1-2

Tuesday

• Trey Social Studies 1
• Tarran Live Lesson Algebra 10
• Titus Live Lesson 9
• Mom- Errand Day

Wednesday

• Church
• Trey Live Lesson Math 11-12
• Trey Live Lesson Homeroom 2-3
• Tarran Live Lesson English 10-11
• Tarran Live Lesson Physical Science 12:05-12:55

Thursday

• Trey Live Lesson Math 11-12
• Tarran Live Lesson U.S. History 11-12
• Titus Live Lesson 9
• Mom-Deep clean Day

Friday

Saturday

• Clutter busting Day

Sunday

• Family Day

I hope to use this in the future with my daily schedule.

The next thing I did was to write down the things that I do everyday automatically i.e. brushing teeth, washing face, making dinner, laundry.  Then I made a list of the things that I want to make automatic in my schedule i.e. dusting, mopping,sweeping.  The last thing I did was to break them into morning, mid-day and before bed/evening.  I am hoping that tomorrow I can start fleshing out my daily routine and schedule.